Lord, you asked me to journal more today so this is my attempt at doing so.
My faith in You, Lord feels weak. My fear constantly overrides my trust and belief in your promises.
Even my sacrificial ‘offering’ of giving up coffee and alcohol for the days leading up to Rosh Shoshana and Yom Kippur, is a feeble attempt to honor You by honoring Israel, Your chosen people.
It feels like such a insignificant offering as people, Christians and others, are losing their lives for You.
We’re surrounded by signs of the collapse of civilization as we have known it. Yet so many of us are going about our daily lives as if it’s “business as usual” and things are just FINE.
Thank you for waking me up many years ago out of a cultural, societal induced slumber and for growing me ever so slowly, against my need for ‘instant gratification,’ over the years.
If I hadn’t seen the proof of Your Existence through the miracles you have worked in my life, I would probably have a harder time believing You have our best interest at heart.
But the biggest miracle you saw fit to bless me with – and one for which I had not consciously prayed – was the deliverance of the gift of my most beautiful, godly wife.
Except there’s not a day goes by that I don’t wish I had prepared myself better for her.
I pray for all of my friends and neighbors around the world that they allow You into their hearts so they will have Hope and Belief in You because that is the only thing that makes sense in a world that disintegrates around us.
Thank You for listening Lord. And Thank You for giving me the ears and the heart to listen to you.
Because when I don’t listen to You and I think that I know what is best for me my life is living proof that definitely isn’t true.
Your son, Bert